Saturday, February 28, 2009

Laundry baskets, staircases, dryers...

Our youngest child is in constant danger from his older brothers. The youngest believes (and does) everything his older brothers tell him to do. If you add the fact that the three older brothers have extraordinary imaginations, I fear for his life every day. 

For example: One day I found the youngest in a plastic laundry basket at the top of the basement stairs. Behind him were two of his brothers, prepared to launch him down 15 steep steps. Fortunately I stopped them just in time. 

"You may NOT, under ANY circumstances, use a laundry basket as a sled!" 

Another example: I am headed to our laundry room in the basement and I find an older brother coaxing the youngest into the dryer. 

Me: "WHAT do you think you are doing!"
Older brother: "Trying to find him a hiding place - we are playing hide and go seek!"
Youngest: "It's ok mom. We are not going to dry me."

Oh my God. 

Another example: I look up to see the youngest being pushed by the 8-year-old in the backyard in a wagon at lightening speed. Seriously - they are booking. The problem is that the handle of the wagon is facing the front... and the 8-year-old is pushing from the back.

In my mind, I imagine what is about to take place. I run to the backdoor, open it, and scream at the top of my lungs: "BOYS!"

And, my imagination becomes reality as the handle of the wagon jams into the ground making the wagon a catapult and flinging my youngest into orbit. The 8-year-old slides face first to a halt and for just a split second no one moves. 

Then, the two of them simultaneously jump up and yell, "We're ok! What did you say?"

Obviously, they are going to make it. Me on the other hand... 


  1. Being the youngest of 2, I also was on the wrong end of an older brothers bored imagination. Sometimes crash test dummy, sometimes lab rat, but allways a punching bag... This continued pretty much until I turned 13 and Carl (older brother) discovered girls. I wish you, and Ethan the best of luck, and a good helmet.