Stuffing Your Pants

We are home no more than a hour from our Memorial weekend trip, and the boys are fighting.

I ignored it for about 20 minutes - but then the piercing screams from the 5-year-old hit a new octave - and I had HAD it.

I went marching down the stairs, already using my "angry voice."

Me: OK - THAT is IT! WHAT is going ON down here!

Ethan's face is red and sweaty, tears are running down his face and his screaming hits a high as I approach. His arms outstretched, he is holding a stuffed bunny in each hand. One is a cute blue Beanie Baby - the other is not. And frankly, looks kinda scary. He got from the "cousins" house during our weekend stay.

Me: WHAT is WRONG?!

Ethan: ZAAAAAAAAAACCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHH!

Zach is lounging on the recliner watching television... ignoring what is happening. Zayd is perched on another chair watching me like a spectator - waiting to see how THIS one is going to go down.

Ethan: ZAAAAAAAAACHHHHH!

Me: WHAT! WHAT did Zach do!

I am now yelling even louder than before so Ethan can even hear me over his screams. So I CAN even hear me over his screams.

Ethan: ZAAAAAACHHHHH TOOK MY TOYS AND PUT THEM IN HIS PANTS!!!!

Pause. Uhhh.. Did I hear that right?

Another scream.

Yes. Yes, I did hear that correctly.

Me: ZACHARY!

Zach sits straight up and looks at me.

Zach: What! He kept throwing them at me! I told him if he did it again, I was going to put them in my pants.

Ethan: NOOOOOOOOOO! (Another piercing scream).

Oh my. I'm going to start laughing - and Zach can see it coming. So he starts smiling at me.

I turn my head away to pull myself together. "Angry voice Najla! Become one with your angry voice."

Pause

Me: Zachary!

Ethan: ZAAACCCHHHH's PENIS TOUCHED MY TOYYYYYYSSSSS!

Zach, Zayd and I are now covering our mouths with our hands. After a few moments, I conjure up my angry voice again.

Me: Zach. Did you put the toys in your pants or in your underpants?

Zach: Just in my pants.

Me: Seeeeee Ethan! He JUST put your toys in his pants, not in his underwear. See?

Ethan: HE DID! I SAWED HIM!

Me: No Ethan. He said he did not. ZACH! Say you are sorry for putting his toys in your pants. And mean it!

Zach: (Serious voice) Ethan. I am sorry I put your toys in my pants.