Friday, April 16, 2010

Gamma radiation and midi-chlorians

I was driving with Zach in the car. I was in a foul mood.

Me: Oh. Great. Yeah. Just walk right in the middle of the parking lot so I have to drive behind you at 1 mile and hour. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.  (I huffed about a woman who was in my way as I was looking for a parking spot at Target).

A few moments later.

Me: Good God! Why bother parking in between the lines when you could park right on top of them!

A few moments later we get out of the car. We walk by a car with a dog barking in it.

Zach: Stupid dog! Sitting there and barking like an idiot!

Me: Why did you say that?

Zach: I didn't want to miss out on all the fun you were having.


After our Target trip, we get back into the car.

Me: I don't know why I am in such a crabby mood today. I hate that. I don't want to be in a crabby mood.

Zach: Do you want me to figure it out?

Me: Uhmmm... you can't figure it out.

Zach: You don't know me very well.

Me: Fine. What's wrong with me?

Zach: Have you ever been exposed to gamma radiation? (he says in a serious voice, totally straight-faced).

Me: What?!

Zach: Just answer the question please.

Me: No. What would that mean if I had?


Zach: Bruce Banner?


Me: Oh! The Green Hulk?

Zach: The Incredible Hulk mom. He's incredible.

(I start laughing...)

Zach: Have you ever been bit by a spider?

Me: (I burst out laughing). No!

Zach: Have you ever worn a ring with a green lantern on it?

I am trying to remember which character did that...

Me: No. Why?

Zach: Don't ask questions please.

Me: Sorry. But I just want to know...

(he cuts me off)

Zach: Shhh. Shh. Sh. Just focus on my questions.


Zach: Are you force-sensitive or do you have high levels of midi-chlorians in your blood?

Me: What?!

Zach: Mom. Mom. Mom. You aren't being helpful. You need to focus on my questions and answer honestly.

Me: I don't think so. What would happen if I was?

Zach: You'd be a Jedi.

I start laughing again.

Me: Are Jedi's always in a bad moods?

He sighs

Zach: Mom. Darth Vader.

Me: Ooohhhhh. Of course. Do you think that's my problem? I'm Darth Vader?

Zach: There's only one Darth Vader mom.

Me: So why are you asking me about that!

Zach: Shhhhh.... calm down. I'm trying to rule out all possibilities.

By that point, I couldn't help but be in a good mood. Zach always knows how to make me laugh. 

God I'm going to miss him when he goes off to college.


  1. Is it bad that, after laughing my way through this, I still want to scold you for not knowing the Green Lantern? (Don't worry... It'll be a Ryan Reynolds movie next year, so I'm sure you'll know all about him, then.)

  2. Hey - I even forgot that the Green Hulk was Incredible.