I think I have OCD.
I am totally obsessed over choosing the right colored paper napkins for my graduation party.
Yellow for NDSU? Orange because it is my favorite color? Or pink, in honor of my dissertation of the Mary Kay Corp?
wtf?
I know. It's totally messed up.
Never mind that I STILL have a graduation speech to write (to be delivered in less than 48 hours)... I cannot focus on the speech until I have decided on the napkin color... which of course will decide the color of my cake...
omg.
I haven't ordered the cake.
shit.
AND to top it all off, my closet is messy, my boys rooms look like pits, the mudroom isn't organized and my house smells like candied bacon... because...
BECAUSE....
the only decisive decision I have been able to make in the last two weeks was that I wanted to have candied bacon at my graduation party... and I wasn't about to pay a caterer $1.50 for each slice of candied bacon... so...
My friend Brad and I made candied bacon at my house on Monday...
for four hours...
and I'm pretty sure this is why our new puppy, Mollie, has been over-the-top hyper since Monday night.
Tonight... I am sitting downstairs (typing)... after having opened all the windows in the house, turning on all the fans, wiping down all the counters, walls and cabinets with a mixture of bleach and water... spraying Febreeze on every single inch of fabric... including pillows, rugs, carpet, upholstery (even the leather)... and throwing a pot of boiling water on the stove complete with allspice, whole cloves and five cinnamon sticks... I wait.
And I still smell candied bacon.
And I am blogging...
Instead of writing my speech.
Because frankly, when it gets right down to it... my house not smelling like candied bacon, choosing the right colored napkins to match the right colored cake, and blogging about my OCDish tendencies towards anything having to do with what should be a care-free fun party...
outranks the possibility that I may not be entirely prepared to give a speech on Friday afternoon in front of the president, administration, State Board of Higher Education, members of the university faculty and staff, my fellow graduates, and all their families and friends.
Which begs the following questions...
How do you get the smell of candied bacon out of your house? And...
and probably even more importantly...
yellow, orange or pink?
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The candied bacon smell? Take out your smallest crock pot, add a quart or two of water and dump in a whole box of baking soda. Let it sit on low all day (or all night) with the cover off. That should take care of the smell. Add more water if it seems to be evaporating too quickly. Also works with one of those mini-dippers with a cup of water and a half cup of baking soda but it will also dry out much more quickly.
ReplyDeleteThe napkins? Why not all 3? People combine those colors for weddings all the time! Just go for more sunshine-y yellow instead of the darker gold and you'll be set! Then your Grad cake can have flowers of all three colors.
Okay, I'd probably go with yellow, because it's the most food-friendly color. But, more importantly, how do you make candied bacon?
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