Tonight's Bedtime Conversation with Ethan

Ethan: Mom? Where is that cage I used to sleep in?

Me: Cage?

Ethan: Yeah - that cagey thing I used to sleep in.

Me: Oh! You mean your crib? It's called a crib.

Ethan: But it looks like a cage.

Me: Yes, I suppose you are right. It's in the shed.

Ethan: Why is it in the shed?

Me: Because mommy wants to keep it for when you have babies. You'll bring your babies to visit me and they can sleep in the crib.

Ethan: So I have to buy this house?

Me: No, Dad and I will live in this house.

Ethan: (sigh) Oh goshhh... so I have to build another house now?

Me: Uhhh...

Ethan: (in a frustrated voice) But, why do I have to be the dad when I growed up?

Me: Well... do you want to be the mom?

Ethan: No! Mom's have babies.

(pause)

Ethan: Do I have to get married?

Me: Of course not. You don't ever have to get married if you don't want to.

Ethan: I don't have to get married and I can do whatever I want?

Me: Yes. You do not have to get married and you can do whatever you want.

(pause)

Ethan: Then... I want to be... (hushed voice) The Ice Cream Man.

(pause)

Me: Wow. The ice cream man, huh?

Ethan: Oh no! But I don't know how to drive! How am I going to learn?!

Me: Don't worry. We'll teach you how to drive.

(pause)

Ethan: Then maybe I'll be the... (hushed voice) The Candy Man.

Me: Oookkkaaayyy. That sounds interesting.

Ethan: But I don't know how! (sigh) How do you be a candy man?

Me: I'mmmm noooot....

Ethan: Oh! I really want to be a space man. Is there a thing called a space man?

Me: Yes, there is a thing called a space man. They are called astronauts.

Ethan: Who is going to teach me how to be a space man, mom? (big sigh) I don't know how I am going to learn all this.

Me: You will... you have plenty of time to learn.