Circum-

Evan is the kitchen counter doing homework tonight. Paul is washing dishes and I am sitting nearby...

Evan: Do you know some words that start with circum?

Paul: Circumference

Me: Circumcise

Paul looks at me and smirks

Paul: Circumvent

Me: Hey Evan, do you know what circumcise means?

Evan: No... I have to write down the definitions. I'll do that in a minute.


I start giggling like I'm in 6th grade.

Paul: Evan, don't put down circumcise.

Evan: Why?

Paul: Just don't.

Evan: What does it mean?

Paul: It means to remove the foreskin from a penis.

pause

Evan: What!


I burst out laughing.

Evan: Oh my God. Owww! Why did you tell me that mom?

Me: Dad took the best circum word... circumference. Circumcise is the second best circum word.

Evan: Okay. I am crossing off circumcise. Wow mom.

pause

Evan: What does circumference mean?

Me: It's the circle around the foreskin of a penis that you cut off when you circumcise someone.

Paul starts laughing.

Evan: Mom!

Me: I'm sorry.

A few moments later...

Evan: Okay, now I need some words that begin with fore..

Paul: Forlorn

Evan: Okay... forlorn

Me: Foreplay

Evan: Foreplay....

pause

Evan: What is foreplay?

Me: I'm kidding, don't put down foreplay.

Evan: What does it mean!

Me: Nothing.

Evan: Dad. What is foreplay?

Paul: Don't put that down.

Me: Foreskin.

Paul: Najla.

Evan: Mom!

Me: Okay, okay...

pause

Evan: Okay... how about hemi.

I burst out laughing again.

Paul: What is so funny about hemi?

Me: I have no clue!